Who Stands by Your Side? Tips for Choosing Your Wedding Party

​How to Choose Your Wedding Party: A Guide to Picking Bridesmaids, Groomsmen, and More
​Planning a wedding comes with a long list of decisions, but one of the most personal (and sometimes emotional) choices you’ll make is selecting your wedding party. From your maid of honor to your best man, bridesmaids to groomsmen, these people will stand by your side on one of the most important days of your life — so choosing wisely matters. In this post, we’ll guide you through the process of choosing your wedding party and offer thoughtful tips to help make it stress-free and meaningful.

Kendra Martin Photography

What Is a Wedding Party?
Your wedding party includes the close friends and family members you ask to participate in your wedding ceremony and support you through the planning process. Traditionally, it consists of:

• Maid or Matron of Honor
• Best Man
• Bridesmaids
• Groomsmen
• Flower Girl and Ring Bearer

Things to Consider When Choosing Your Wedding Party

1. Start with Your Inner Circle - Think about the people who’ve been consistently supportive in your life — whether it’s a sibling, childhood best friend, cousin, or college roommate. These should be people you trust and feel comfortable relying on.
2. Size of the Wedding Party - There’s no perfect number. Some weddings have just one attendant per side, while others have eight or more. Base it on the size of your wedding, your venue, and what feels right to you. Keep in mind: the larger the group, the more coordination required. Everyone has to have their hair and makeup done the day of.
3. Avoid Feeling Obligated - You’re not required to include someone just because they asked you to be in their wedding or because you’re close now. Think long-term. Will this person still be in your life next year? Will this person be a calm, supportive presence during your wedding planning journey?
4. Think About Responsibilities - Some wedding party members will have responsibilities like helping plan your bridal shower or bachelor party, attending fittings, or helping guests on the day of the wedding. Choose people who are reliable and enthusiastic.
5. Consider Logistics - If a potential bridesmaid lives across the country or abroad, think about whether they can realistically attend events and contribute in a meaningful way. Long-distance friends can still play a role, just maybe not as formal wedding party members. 

Pro Tips for Picking Bridesmaids and Groomsmen

• Communicate early and clearly. Once you decide, ask them directly and let them know what’s expected.
• Be mindful of budget. Talk openly about expenses (dresses, suits, travel) and try to be considerate.
• Don’t forget non-traditional roles. It’s okay to have a bridesman, groomswoman, or no gender roles at all. Your wedding should reflect you.
• Honor others in different ways. Can’t include everyone? Assign readings, toasts, or special usher duties.

Final Thoughts on Choosing Your Wedding Party
Your wedding party should be made up of people who support your relationship and want to celebrate your love wholeheartedly. Whether you're going with a traditional bridal party or mixing things up, stay true to your vision and prioritize your peace of mind. Choosing your wedding party is one of the first major steps in the wedding planning process — so take your time, trust your instincts, and celebrate the meaningful connections that brought you to this moment.

Darby Bobo Photo